Week 26! 2️⃣6️⃣

Y’all...today we roll into week 26!!

WEEK TWENTY SIX! 2️⃣6️⃣ 

Going into this very unexpected pregnancy, chances of making it this far were very slim...even without battling breast cancer. Berkley came at 24, Sadie at 28, and Henry at 25 so the chances of a 2nd trimester baby are past high. While chances of early delivery are still there, and it is still way too early for Isaac to make his entrance, making it this far is incredible! 

I am so grateful that God sees the bigger picture. Being high risk to lose another baby plus fighting breast cancer sounds impossible, and sometimes feels impossible, but with GOD...(say it with me) nothing is impossible! So here we are...26 weeks pregnant and half way done with chemo! #PraiseHands 🙌🏼#pregnantwithbreastcancer 🤰👚🎗#OnlyHecandoit 

God is still good

It’s hard to believe in the midst of a trial that grace will come. When something so real, so in your face, is glaring back at you day in and day out with no end in sight, it seems impossible to believe any good could come from the pain. Choosing to believe that good is coming, that the goodness of God doesn’t depend on our circumstances, is imperative to recovering and moving through the trial we are in. We must remember that even when it is hard, His strength is all we need. 

I know I’ve prayed for my trials to end. In fact, in a recent testimony I called it a “period”. I was craving a “period” to my trials and just days later was diagnosed with breast cancer. It seems my trials aren’t over and while they frustrate me to no end, while I complain, cry, weep over missing out on things, and even beg God to end all the pain, I know that these trials are a divine appointment. I am grateful that God entrusted me with such a large assignment, but most days I fail to thank God and actually beg for the assignment to be taken away. On the hardest days, I cling to things I know to be true and remain thankful that the goodness of God doesn’t depend on me.

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah‬ ‭41:10‬ ‭

“The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blesses his people with peace.” Psalms‬ ‭29:11‬ 

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”

‭‭Romans‬ ‭15:13‬ ‭NIV‬‬

If we choose to believe God is good at being God, then we can also choose to believe that no matter the circumstance we’re in, it is a divine appointment by God himself. And a divine appointment is one that only God’s goodness can flow. 

I love this Spurgeon quote...

Round 8

Chemo Day...number 8! 

#halfwaythere #EightofSixteen 

GOOD NEWS...the new chemo drug hasn’t been hard on my system at all and Isaac #week25 is still growing so I force myself daily to focus on those two positives.

#pregnantwithbreastcancer🤰👚 🎗

I still can’t walk without a walker so that’s the most frustrating thing for me. I.am.over.the.clot. 🩸 

But y’all, besides David being absolutely incredible, I am in total awe of how amazing our sweet Sadie is. This morning, after David went to work, she followed me to the living room to make sure I didn’t fall. She put the pillows on the couch for me to prop up my leg. She brought me a water and a boost shake. She got herself dressed, let Cosmo out, brushed her teeth, and then asked me what else I needed before she left. She is a superstar 5 year old kid, y’all. I hate that she has to help me but I am so very thankful that she has a helping servants heart. It is amazing to watch her grow into her own independent caring self. ❤️

GOD is good even when our circumstances are not! We MUST choose to trust Him! And it’s a choice...I have had some awful, down right, not so trusting days here lately, but making the choice to trust in God eases every single thought the devil throws my way.

#usedfaceappbcwrinkles&nomakeup

My sweet girl ❤️

This blood clot has me so down, y’all. I can’t walk more than about 10 steps and that’s with a walker. 😑 I have definitely been beyond discouraged this week. I have so many wonderful people that are taking care of me and so many who are also taking care of Sadie. This morning when she got home she had picked me some flowers! My heart just about busted. There are so many big things rocking her little world and she is truly showing so much strength through every bump in the road. She has the most kind, caring, helpful heart. She has to help me sometimes, and as much as I hate it, it makes me proud to see how willing she is to serve. I pray she always has a strong servant heart and loves others the way Jesus did. ❤️

Round 7

Got discharged with these sexy stockings just in time for chemo treatment number 7! Do y’all know what that means? Just 9 to go...THAT IS SINGLE DIGITS!! 

Meanwhile, in the world of blood clot, I have started Lovenox injections twice a day that I’ll continue for the remainder of pregnancy. Large clot = Large pain so this hasn’t been my favorite weekend. I still can’t walk more than 5 or 6 steps but the pain is under control. I have been pretty discouraged this weekend but I am constantly reminded that this is temporary and God sees the bigger picture. 

Large Clot-Large Pain-Bigger God 

“For the Lord comforts his people and will have compassion on his afflicted ones.” Isaiah‬ ‭49:13‬ ‭‬‬

🎶This is My story

🎶This is My Song

🎶Praising my Savior all the day long 

#lookingforjoy #pregnantwithbreastcancer

#praisethroughit

Blood Clot — UGH

On this episode of Lauren is so frustrated but trying to have a good attitude, I have been admitted to Floyd with a blood clot in my leg. I will be starting a treatment plan tonight...🙄🩸

#pregnantwithbreastcancer🤰👚🎗

#justONEbreakplease #smilingbutfrustrated

Virtual School for my girl!

Well this is not the way I wanted our school 🏫 year to start but it is what is best for us right now. I want normal so bad that I grieve it most every day. 😭

Even so, I am beyond grateful for friends that help get my girl excited about Virtual Learning! ❤️

#kindergarten2020 #virtuallearning2020 

#shedoesntknowwhatshewantstobewhenshegrowsup #meeitherbaby

Round 6

Treatment Number 6 was yesterday. 6/16! #knockingthemout #Godisgood

Treatment plan is still the same but unfortunately I have become anemic. So today, after both my OB and Oncologist spoke, I am getting a blood transfusion that will hopefully get me to having more energy and feel more like myself! #whatifigetapsychosblood #willibeMOREcrazy #istheremorecrazy

#breastcancerandpregnancy 👚🎗🤰

This is my fight song 👚🎗🤰

Over the last 8 years, every 2-3 years our family has gotten rocked. Losing our first daughter, Berkley, at 3 days old was devastating. Three years later we were blessed with our rainbow baby Sadie! Three years later we lost our son, Henry,  at 7 days old. With no intention of trying to expand our family, 2 years later I have been given a breast cancer diagnosis and am also pregnant again. We are praying diligently for our sweet rainbow boy Isaac. God has blessed us through each loss and we will continue to praise Him during these uncertain times. God is good, even when our circumstances seem impossible.

Praising God when things are good is easy but praising God when things are uncertain is tough, real tough. If we only praise God in the good, we lose the blessings of trust and faith that relying God is all about. Seeing and feeling God move in every aspect of life, good or bad, reveals so much about Gods character and I don’t want to miss a moment of knowing more about Him!

Round 5 — NEW DRUG

That last round of the Red Devil kicked my tail! I am so thankful to be done with that and eager to get to feeling better! 

Today is round 🤚🏼 and I start a new drug. Praying for minimal side effects!

Let’s kick it! 5/16 

#breastcancerandpregnant #week22

David Isaac Simpson

“Then one of them said, “I will surely return to you about this time next year, and Sarah your wife will have a son.” Now Sarah was listening at the entrance to the tent, which was behind him. Abraham and Sarah were already very old, and Sarah was past the age of childbearing. So Sarah laughed to herself as she thought, “After I am worn out and my lord is old, will I now have this pleasure?” Then the Lord said to Abraham, “Why did Sarah laugh and say, ‘Will I really have a child, now that I am old?’ Is anything too hard for the Lord? I will return to you at the appointed time next year, and Sarah will have a son.””

‭‭Genesis‬ ‭18:10-14‬ ‭

“Now the Lord was gracious to Sarah as he had said, and the Lord did for Sarah what he had promised. Sarah became pregnant and bore a son to Abraham in his old age, at the very time God had promised him. Abraham gave the name Isaac to the son Sarah bore him.”

‭‭Genesis‬ ‭21:1-3‬ 

Meet David “Isaac” Simpson...Because “is anything too hard for the Lord” ❤️

#tomorrowisweek22

#prayingthroughthescaryweeks 

#breastcancerandpregnancy

Round 4 — last of Red Devil!

Number FOUR! 👩🏼‍🦲

I’m 1/4 of the way done...like 1/2 of a 1/2 y’all! And it’s the last of the Red Devil!! Wahoo! 🙌🏼👊🏼👏🏼

#Godisgood #BCandPREG #4/16

Half way there!!

Round 3

Set-Back

Well y’all, yesterday should have been round 3 of chemo...but my body had other plans. I had to spend the weekend at Hotel Floyd due to some crazy pain I was experiencing. Good news is they got the pain under control, bad news is there is so much going on with my treatment plus pregnancy it is pretty much impossible to pin point the exact cause of the pain. It was a pretty frustrating weekend but we are staying on track and chemo will resume next week. #BC&PREG #wegonnabeatit